An Honest Thought

Today I rant.

With the recent case of ‘coloured discomfort’ faced by many Indians across the world, because of Nina Davuluri, that seems to be a another pin holding up the masks of the general public, laced with hypocrisy. If many Indian smarted at the behavior of Americans, we cant get away just by calling them racist. How different are we in our own homeland?

India… the land of snake charmers, white elephants and a tribe of beggars who stick up their begging bowls right under your face. Do you think we’ve changed? Changed from the many prehistoric notions we nursed under our hood, whether it included homosexuality or even looking up to certain careers as the only way forward? But sometimes I doubt we’ve changed at all when even in the best of cities, best of working environments, among the best of colleagues one is ridiculed for their body weight, amoebic shape and … you get the rest.

If certain groups are fighting against prejudice towards skin colour, then pray, does a perfect body type rule the world?

The other day, the HR personnel in my office asked me… ‘Are you dieting?’ I said, ‘No.’ And then she said, ‘Haan, lag bhi nahi raha hain.’

I mean I get it to a certain level. She is going to get married in a few month’s time, and looking good is on her agenda. But why be spiteful towards the others? We, fat people, sure must put on a heavy armour everyday before we leave home for our respective work. Why are we incapable of accepting people the way they are. Does everyone want everyone to look alike? Have the world looking like the Stepford Wives?

A friend of mine, to whom I mostly relate these moments tells me that ‘I am delusional, I must not let them get the better of me, body type is not directly or indirectly proportional to your worth (whichever way we assume the factors). But then again, with a ‘perfect’ body, beautiful ‘long hair’ (just the way India and the rest of the world like it) and dazzling smile, you do not live my world. You do not have to struggle through everyday avoiding stinging jabs at your personality.

Do we not relate it all to beauty? DO elaborate what constitutes a beautiful object. Does not an old proverb say beauty lies in the eye of the beholder? So I must deem my worth according to what the other person thinks.

Students, activists, factions of the general public strive to make the world a better place to live. They protest, they rant and they fight for the poor, against the corrupt, the greedy, etc. It makes me think, that if they harboured this flame of unrest and undying need to fight for a stranger, why can they not understand the need of a friend? Cause I still have my hands and legs and can work for myself? Why can people not start to revolutionise the society at their own level? A step at a time, try to reason with friends and family, one person at a time? Or have we romanticised the experience of sitting at Jantar Mantar and spending an entire shouting and putting up placards to fight against corrupt individuals and organisations?

You may label me as moody, misreading the words and actions of others. Then why do I feel humiliated and hurt on the inside?