Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Thoughts of Divinity, Reason and Impure Blasphemy

God creates Man fresco in the Sistine Chapel. (Google)
Religion. This word holds different meanings for so many, yet nothing to others. My head was set, drifting in the clouds, above the dusty earth yet miles from the pearly heaven. Trained, taught and accustomed to the Catholic way of life, I slowly started to loosen the hinges of my mind. But still restrained, controlled and in the verandah. Gazing out at the fields and the numerous fences that encircle it. I viewed the happenings, as objectively as I could. But the nagging little voice inside, kept saying, “Does evolution trump Eden’s denizens after all?”

I will still stay truthful to my faith, but one wonders, does percentage matter? Picking and choosing as I wish, will God forgive me for gluttony and condemn for another? My head is heavy in the clouds, wondering what to do and which path to take. You may accuse me of faithlessness, but I seek to search truth in the larger space.

Till date, I wished to study theology, and delve deeper into the relationships of Christians, Jews and Muslims. But over the past few months, atheists, agnostics and hypatia has bombarded my pea-brain like anything. I respect science, but had never dethroned God because of it. I had made up my mind and I was fine with it. Why now do I question that decision again? Does death affect it? Have I been written off for the devil for good now? Who is there answer my questions? Who can solve the puzzles in my brain. If God dwells in me, why should I look elsewhere. If he is in me and you, why is there the need for a temple, mosque or church?

The divine beginnings of God have been greatly marred by the actions of Man. What is, what remains, what is the truth and what is twisted is unrecognizable. Will not just our good actions not be enough to guarantee a place in the eternal everafter?

Somewhere I hope that God is not listening. For I don’t want to meet the Devil to see the light in God.